Have you ever tried many different coping skills only to find out that they did not work? I was at this position during my mental health journey. There were many things that I heard have great benefits, so I tried them. I’ve tried journaling, and it worked pretty well. Exercising was something that was great as well. However, none of these things truly solved my problem. It wasn’t until I looked into coping styles that made me find a solution to my depression.
There are 4 different coping styles that I’m going to show you today. Find out what kind of coping skills work with the problem that you’re dealing with.
Positive Coping Style
Positive coping is one of the best forms of coping that you can do. In a nutshell, positive coping is any coping skill or mechanism that makes you feel good inside, and that improves your mental health.
Some great examples of positive coping is
- Journaling
- Meditation
- Exercise
- Trying A New Hobby
- Going to a Therapist or Counselor
- Social Support
Those are just a few examples of positive coping for you. It’s important to note that some of these coping skills will overlap with other coping styles. Just because these coping skills are labeled as positive does not mean that they are ideal.
Some mental health issues that need positive coping
- Depression
- Anxiety
- Stress
- Suicidal Thoughts
- Anger
- Self-Esteem Problems
These issues are things that people encounter everyday in their life. With positive coping skills, you can effectively deal and manage with whatever issues that you’re facing.
The primary goal of these positive coping skills is to shift your negative thinking into positive ones by doing things that make you feel good. Out of all of the coping styles listed, this is one of the easiest coping styles to use.
However, the effects of these coping skills comes in the long-term meaning that it takes a while for you to get through the mental health issues that you’re experiencing.
Negative Coping Style
Negative coping is easy to understand. Think of all of the ways that you cope that you know isn’t good for you, but makes you feel good instantly.
The problem with this way of coping is that it doesn’t help you feel good about yourself, it just provides you with a good feeling at that moment.
Some examples of negative coping is:
- Shopping
- Drinking
- Partying
- Smoking
- Crying
- Procrastinating
- Binge Eating (If you don’t have an eating disorder)
- Complaining
As you can see, these are coping skills that we all use on a daily or at least a weekly basis. It lets us unwind and not think about the difficult times in our lives, which is a good thing.
However, the problem with the negative coping style is that most people rely on these coping skills and not ones that are more beneficial to them.
The negative coping style does not help any mental health issue as most of these coping skills serves as a distraction instead of a solution. Out of all of the coping styles mentioned, this is the worst one to engage in.
Approach Coping Style
Probably one of the best coping styles out there, we have approach coping. Approach coping is coping skills that help you get rid of the problems that caused your mental health issues.
The approach coping style focuses more on finding a solution to the problems that you’re dealing with. Without approach coping, your problems would eventually affect you in the long-term which is not what you want.
Some examples of approach coping is:
- Journaling
- Getting A New Hobby
- Contacting A Hotline
- Exercising
- Crying
- Seeking Professional Help
- Support Groups
- Complaining
Every mental health issue can benefit from approach coping, which makes it the best coping style to engage in. Pair approach coping with positive coping to make the best combination of coping skills.
As you can see, some of the coping skills from positive and negative coping styles overlap with approach coping. It is because some of those coping skills involve a feel good moment (positive/negative) while allowing you to take action towards the issue or problem that you’re trying to deal with.
Avoidance Coping Style
Avoidance coping is probably worst form of coping out there because it heavily involves distracting yourself which isn’t good in the long run. The avoidance coping style involves coping skills that help you distract yourself from what’s causing your mental health problems, but doesn’t solve them.
The most beneficial thing you can do is to tackle your problems head on and not avoid them. When you avoid them, you become accustom to it and you always avoid any problem that you have.
Some examples of aviodance coping is:
- Listening To Music
- Shopping
- Drinking
- Partying
- Reading
- Drawing
- Spending Time With Friends
- Complaining
Please note that none of these coping skills are bad if you are doing them as activities and not for coping. It’s when you use them to cope with your mental health problems that’s the issue. Some of these coping skills can be beneficial to you.
For example, spending time with friends and listening to music are two great coping skills. Your friends can provide you with help and support. They may even give you some advice or better coping skills to prepare you for those tough mental health problems you’re dealing with.
Listening to music is good for when you feel angry and stressed out because it relaxes you and puts you in a good mood (that’s why it’s also in the positive coping style).
Conclusion
In conclusion, it is best to pair positive coping skills with approach coping skills to ensure that you have the best results long-term.
If you’re more focused about feeling good short-term, then negative coping and avoidance coping can work for you.
What are your favorite coping skills that you go to whenever you’re dealing with a mental health issue?
